Have you ever met someone that creates “storms” wherever they go? I interact with a Storm Maker very frequently, and I am really struggling. The atmosphere in the room can be peaceful and positive, but as soon as the Storm Maker walks in, peace and positive flee – the room sours. The petty snapping and bickering often spreads from the Storm Maker to others, until everyone is angry and defensive. Everything is always about them, they are always a victim, and everyone else is at fault for any and all problems, both real and imaginary. I can wager safely that 9 days out of ten, I have committed some wrong – most of the time, I have no clue what it is. It may be what I said or what I didn’t say or – who knows. A simple event or change can explode without warning into a full-blown cyclone. Once the cyclone passes, the Storm Maker feels better, relaxed, and cheerful. But there is a trail of carnage and destruction – hurt feelings, frustration, and I am ashamed to admit – growing RESENTMENT.
Sadly, the Storm Maker is actually a good person with many great qualities. I truly care about this person and would hate to cause hurt or unhappiness, I just don’t know how to break the cycle or stop enabling it. More importantly, how do I avoid getting “sucked up” in the storm? I clearly cannot change this person, nor do I have the right to do so. I am not the potter. I cannot change the interaction – so I must change me – but how? I am trying to get out of the darkness and I cherish any little bit of “peace” I can find.
I am praying.
ah I know the storm maker well…and rather than changing yourself I was advised change your reaction/response
not always easy – why does someone else get to dictate the temperature of the room?!
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Oh my, dictate is exactly the right word! You are right
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